Story 1 (It’s about the cat, just a heads up):
Well, let’s see. My cat is particularly attracted to water. She likes
to sit in the sink and doesnt even move her dainty little body if the
water starts trickling down. She really likes to go in the tub. This
time, though, she really ran the gamut. She jumped in the tub when it
was full of water. And I was in it. She was soaked from head to toe,
scared out of her mind, and I tried my best to hold onto her so I
didn’t have to suffer from millions of waterlogged pawprints all around
the apartment. She is fine now, and smells a bit like shaving gel, but
her fur is a bit shinier and smoother. Sigh, such is life.

Story 2:
My mom has asked me to compile my Christmas list. What she doesn’t
realize is that most of the things I want are on the expensive side.
Examples, you say?
“Canine and Feline Theriogenology” by Shirley D. Johnston, Margaret V. Root Kustritz, and Patricia N. Olson [Only a mere $80!]
“Veterinary Pediatrics: Dogs and Cats from Birth to Six Months” by
Johnny D. Hoskins [Only $70!]. I don’t know about you, but ‘Johnny’
doesn’t sound very professional.

Oh yes, I also want an elliptical machine [runs like $500], a simple gold chain, pearl earrings, and some DVDs.
I’m such a brat.

Story 3:
My chemistry test was such a killer. There really is no story, but it
deserves a category of its own in case it feels like contaminating
anything else.

Story 4:
I called the vet’s office today to schedule the Devil Kitty’s booster
shot appointment, and the receptionist knew who I was by my voice.
“Hi, yes, I would like to schedule an appointment for my kitten’s next set of shots for sometime this week.”
“Oh, is this Kate? Is this for your little one?”
“Yes…”

Overheard statement:
“Yeah, man, sorry I can’t do anything tonight. It’s my anniversary with my girlfriend… yeah, I know, I got my balls tied.”

WHAT. A. DAY.

Well, things are a bit better.
Here is a story for you laugh at:

Last night (er, this morning at 2:15 am) I was eating a chocolate chip
cookie. I made a phone call (yep, even that late/early) and
accidentally left the cookie sitting on my desk. I forgot that Sasha
was wandering around. I looked back about 15 minutes later to see her
sitting on my desk licking her chops. There was no cookie to be found.
I freaked out, thinking she ate this whole chocolate chip cookie and at
her weight, it could be mightily fatal. I called the emergency vet
hospital where they preceded to tell me to put some salt down her
throat to induce vomiting. Fifteen minutes went by and she still hadn’t
vomited. I decided not to screw around anymore and just bring her to
the hospital even though I was sure that the bills were gonna be very
high. But I’d rather pay that than lose her. All the way to the
hospital, I am freaking out. It had been raining so I was trying to
make it there without sliding off the road or getting pulled over,
considering I was doing about 70 mph in a 55 mph zone. I slowed down
when I saw a cop but I was still freaking out. She wasn’t making any
noises in her carrier like usual so I drove there hoping everything was
going to be alright. We got there in one piece, and I rushed in. They
took her vitals and all seemed fine. They gave her something (forgot
what) that is put in her occipital gland to induce vomiting. One hour
passes. No vomiting. They decide to let her go home and for me to keep
a watch on her. At this point, I am convinced that my kitten is
absolutely the weirdest kitten alive. What animal eats an entire
chocolate chip cookie and doesn’t vomit? It’s like poison to them. As I
was driving home, I was thinking that if I came home to find the
chocolate chip cookie in the garbage can (it’s right next to my desk)
or on the floor I was going to be very angry at the fact that I wasted
an hour (but wasted no money because they didn’t charge me – yay). I
get home. I check the garbage can.

The cookie was in there.

---

Two classes this week before Thanksgiving break. I’m going home on
Wednesday. Sasha has a vet appointment for booster shots when I am
home. Last ones for an entire year. She has surgery in January (double
surgery at the same time – poor girl). I can’t wait until the end of
the semester. I hate this semester. A couple more weeks and then I’m
done!

---

If I don’t get around to it, Happy Thanksgiving!!

Dear Life,
Why do you suck so hard?
Love, Me

“Catch me,” it said over its shoulder. “Work for me. You think you don’t need me, but you do.”
The years fly by and we wander the streets – early in the morning, late
in the night, between crowds of faceless people, or just on a road as
bare as the desert. We dream about it; we think about it; we write
about it. We scream its name with the hope it is listening, with a
prayer it will just float to us. Our days begin at six a.m., followed
by the hot steaming morning cup of coffee, the long commute to work on
a bus packed with dozens of other people who follow the exact same
routine. As the sun makes it way high into the sky, we sit in the desk
at the job longing to be out of there. Then it’s back on the bus at
five p.m., only to come home to a microwaved dinner and crappy
primetime television. We read a book and we see it in there. We wonder
how those people got so lucky. As the darkness settles around us, we
pull the covers up around us with the lump in our throat. We make
ourselves hold back the tears as months of being alone turn into years.
The weekend rolls around, and we see what we really don’t want to.
Couples holding hands, couples kissing, couples being couples. We are
reminded that we don’t have that. It gets to us, but we pretend it
doesn’t. The night is young. Maybe something will happen. We keep
hoping we’ll find the “one”. Sometimes we end up with a meaningless one
night stand where we can’t remember the face of the other person
because we are blinded behind the fucking. It all comes to end, though.
Those years of being alone are replaced by days, months, years, decades
of what we have been searching for. It’s hard, and it hurts. We have to
work harder at it than we have ever worked at anything. Sometimes we
want to give up, but then we remember those nights in bed with that
faceless person. We can’t go back there, we must not. So we find a way
to push through, to make it last. We hold onto the easy times to
remember when hard times come. It’s not all sweet with rounded corners.
There are some sharp edges moving about. Pasts collide as futures mesh.
And we see ourselves catching it. Holding it in the palm of our hand
never felt better.

—-
Update:
- Finished gods in Alabama. It was fabulous. I finished it in less than 24 hours. I just couldn’t put it down.
- Either I’m having time issues or the bus schedule is because I barely
(and I mean, barely) make it to the bus stop on time to flag down the
bus.
- Applied to 5 jobs tonight. Got an email back on one but it doesn’t start until January. Still looking forward to something.
- It’s waaaay too cold.
- My mom got my sisters and I tickets to the Nickelback/Breaking
Benjamin/Three Days Grace concert for March 2. It was supposed to be a
Christmas present (I didn’t even know about the concert until my sister
mentioned it) but my littlest sister was bratting around and my mom had
to crack. Sooo excited!
- Sasha is such a big girl now, with a roly poly tummy.
- It’s exciting to open your mail box after a shitty Chem lab to find two movies in it and no bills!
- Can I sleep through winter and wake up to straight A’s, a job, and a lot of money?
- Made some Peanut Butter blossoms. Mmmm, good.
- “Show Me The Money”? How about… lame. (Just happened to catch it on tv.)
- Five more days of class until Thanksgiving Break! Yeah, bitches!!

Kate

It’s
been about a half week since I’ve written. I know, I know. I should say
I’ve been busy but really I’ve been tired. This weekend was pretty
fantabulous. I hung out with Ashley on Saturday afternoon. We went
shopping (and I got a new shirt – and it’s green – like omg, I now own
something green!?). We also got books. Lots of books. It should keep me
company on long winter nights.



I drove home on Saturday night to
see my parents and stayed until this afternoon. I missed them! I went
shopping with my mom today for some paint, a Christmas (artifical) tree
for my apartment, some things for the cats, groceries, and a mattress.
She’s turning my room into a guest room/my dad’s room now that I’ve
moved out. I haven’t done any homework this weekend but it’s not like I
actually care. I have tests next week (lol – and haven’t studied) but
I’ll just cram it all in the day before.



So, Oreo is scared of Sasha. There
were a couple of incidents in less than 24 hours which insued between
the two of them. Sasha thinks Oreo is a playmate and Oreo thinks Sasha
is a threat. Let’s just say… um, Oreo is cranky. Very cranky. She was
even hissing when Sasha wasn’t around. She’s old, so I guess I’ll give
her that but she was freaking me out today. Poor Sasha spent a lot of
time locked up in my room so Oreo didn’t attack.



I know I’m a little late on this,
but hey – yay (!!) that the Democrats got the House. I don’t know if
they got the Senate because I don’t pay attention that much but how
exciting to get the House?! Hell yes. Maybe we can actually do
something in this country. There is a little personal issue I have
going on that I hope gets solved, but it’s all based on the
government’s decisions so once presidential elections come around I
might just be voting on that issue. I know that sounds totally bad but
it’s like UBER SUPER DUPER IMPORTANT. That’s all I’m saying about that.



It’s too cold. I hate cold weather.
Make it go away. But! I did find one new feature on my car. When it’s
cold and it’s been raining my car beeps and it shows “Ice Possible”.
Like, I didn’t know a car could do that! How cool.



Ok, book list:



A Widow for One Year by John Irving

gods in Alabama by Joshilyn Jackson

Empire Falls by Richard Russo

White Oleander by Janet Fitch

girl talk by Julianna Baggott

for one more day by Mitch Albom (omg! <3 love)

Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov

Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden (OMGGGG!!! LOVE LOVE LOVE)



K, that’s it. I’m sure you’ll be seeing more books I’m gonna be reading soon. It’s becoming an OBSESSION.

“I am on the edge. I want to dive deep into that dark abyss, and let it
swallow me whole. I know you are here, somewhere. Come closer – don’t
be scared. I’m here, I’m here, I’m right here. Let’s just wrap
ourselves in this; this promise – this blanket of warmth and happiness
- this love. Just give into it, don’t be afraid of it. Understand that
I care about you. I need you. Don’t leave because it’s too hard. I’ve
held on too long because I subconsciously wanted this. I know this is
hard and almost too painful to bear but it’s worth it. We both know
that even if we don’t admit it. I’m scared too. Scared of hurting you,
scared of not trusting myself, scared of being vulnerable. It comes
with the territory. We can’t let it eat us alive.”

“Don’t fear, darling, I’m here too. Right beside you, holding you up.
It’s okay that we’re scared. Just lay here with me, listen to those
sweet nothings in your ear. Promises are meant to be kept. We’ll keep
ours. I love you in so many ways, but don’t make me be the only one who
sacrifices. I’m trying here. I want us to be happy. We both need
support. You’re wonderful. Don’t get caught up in the distance. Let’s
meet in the middle – where we belong.”

“But it’s hurting to be so far away. I don’t want that to be a factor anymore. Why can’t this be simple?”

“Nothing is simple. I wish we could have had our way by now but it’s
just not in the cards yet. I miss you. Don’t pull away from me any
longer. Just say put. You’ll be okay. Let what you feel course through
you. I don’t want to hurt you. I just want us together peacefully,
however that may be.”

“Come hold me.”

“In due time. I  know how much it hurts. Hang in there a little
longer. We can do it. Don’t cry. It’s okay. It will all be fine. I hate
when you cry. Sweetheart, okay, okay. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“Come soon.”

“Coming as soon as I can, girl, coming as soon as I can….”

—-

Here we are again, in this place. Caught in between the words we can’t
say. And we’re stuck, helplessly clinging to what we have built up.
There is so much we feel that can’t be put into words – questions
without answers, statements without proper descriptors. All because
there are no words. The silence lingers and in you, I find the answers
without words. Do you see the same in me?

—-

Under the pitch black sky littered with stars, lay with me on a
patchwork quilt decades old. Plant butterfly kisses across my eyelids
and run your fingers through my hair. Let me breathe in that rustic
smell of yours, loan me that sweatshirt of yours I love as the night
gets colder. I can see myself in your eyes, falling into them, getting
lost. Let me love you. Embrace the feeling. Capture it whole.

I’m
such a jealous person. I am trying to work through it and try to get it
out of my personality, but I seem stuck with it. I get jealous over
things that happened years (and I mean, years) ago. It’s like if
something really isn’t my going my way or I can’t be in control of it,
that jealousy (and envy) kicks right in. I know what has happened in
the past stays in the past, and there is no use to bringing it into the
present – but ugh. I just get more mad at myself when I do things like
this. I’ve been trying some self-therapy on myself and I thought I was
making some strides but I feel like I’ve been backsliding this week.
Things will work out the way they are supposed to in the way they are
supposed to and I need to find solace in that.



I’m eating hummus right now and my
body couldn’t be happier with me. I also had a salad with a sandwich
today for lunch. The hummus I have right now is Roasted Red Pepper
(which is delicious). I eat it with saltine crackers. Better than other
snacks, and I love it.



Anyways, so I’ve been struggling
with definition in my life. I want a definition of something, but there
is nothing I can do to force it into place. I think I fear it not
working out the way I think it’s going to, and if it doesn’t, it will
suck. Hardcore suck. I have talked to Tina a lot this week and she’s
helping me through some things but it’s still there lingering over my
head. I wake up every morning and wonder. I don’t want to wonder, I
want to know. It feels up in the air, and I want it back on the ground
where I can grasp it. I’ll let you know all know when it’s fixed, but
it’s not up to me.



The weather is driving my cat crazy, and in turn, making me insane. Wish it would go back to summer. I like that a lot better.



Internship interview tomorrow, see ya all later.