January 30, 2006
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[there is no title]
The wind tousled my hair over my part, and in the horizon I searched
for innocence lost past gone. The mix of pink and orange and burnt red
and light purple reminded me of fingerpainting in kindergarden and how
free it felt. Since then, slowly but surely, responsibility placed upon
my shoulder. Weighing them down. Burdens I wished to release. In my
eyes the tip of the sun found its gaze. A glazed look overtook those
hazel circles in my eyes, opening wide and prominent as the waves of
grass reflected into them. The earth never ended, so it seemed. The
journey of life never ended as well. Irony found itself a nesting place
in the warmest spots it could find. When we are young, we wish to be
older. When we are older, we wish to be young. We yearn for what we
never have at the moment, always searching for the next satisfaction in
life to come upon our way, until we get sick of it and move along to
the next one.Happiness is so dynamic. It moves and waves and crosses over things
that maybe one could never have known it to cross. It breaks down
barriers, and smoothes over rough edges. I could feel it in my heart,
pumping blood slowly through my veins. I was a living. Breathing.
Human. I felt what others felt. I knew what others knew. But yet, I
felt so alone in this moment. Surrounded by beauty, and it all felt so
wrong. But so right at the same time. Irony set itself up again in the
moment. Rights, wrongs, yes’s, no’s. All at the same time, over and
over again.Here I stood, at the brink of something that I felt like was near the
end, yet so far from it. I could never reach the end, it’s near
impossible. Running for days, I could never reach the end. It was a
continuous circle, one that was reflective of life in itself.
Wow, um, this sucks.
Going to vomit my words into something that resembles what this looks like.
