November 3, 2005
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I’m tired. Physically tired, emotionally tired, psychologically tired. My body feels like it’s shutting down, along with my mind and my sanity. I have so many papers to write with no motivation to get started. I have chapters to read, notes to take, tests to pass, work to do, more work to do, and even more work to do.
I hate being busy but I love it as well. My next four weeks are going to be so busy I’m not sure I’ll have a moment to breathe in between all the things I have to do. The only thing that I am glad about is that today is Thursday. Thursday means that it is my night for television shows. And I will watch them because it keeps me from going crazy.
My mom called me this morning at 7, and left a message asking me if I was still alive. Yup, Mom, I’m still alive… just barely, and exhausted, and so goddamn tired. I’ll call her back at five, maybe she’ll answer her phone then. I want to talk to my mom and tell her how things are going… just every time I sit down to do it, something comes up. I feel like I don’t even sleep anymore.
All I know is that in four weeks, we have Christmas break. I cannot freaking wait. I’m sleeping in. And riding. Sleeping, riding, and doing work for my dad. Sleeping, riding, working, and hanging out with Michelle. New Years better be a night where I get trashed because God knows, I need it. I haven’t been out in over a month. I just have so much work to do, and when I’m not doing work I’m sleeping… I want to out, I really do. I don’t have much money anymore, I don’t feel like spending the money I do have, and plus, I’m tired.
I’m real fucking tired.
[I'll write later.]
Comments (1)
Thursday used to be my TV night – it was Friends, Will&Grace, Scrubs, Third Watch, and ER. Now, I don’t have time for TV anymore. I don’t remember the last time I picked up the remote for anything other than to set the alarm (yes, my TV is my alarm, and it turns onto VH1, which I don’t consider as watching TV as much as listening to music)